Katie Turns 2

Our little Suichuan princess is now 2. She can actually tell you that herself, but she's still just holding up 1 finger. We'll have to work on that. It's been awhile since I've updated this site, but that is primarily due to the day-to-day fun of raising two kids. When I look at the pile of photographs and other items to be put in scrapbooks some day, I generally decide that I'd rather have time with the kids and home cooked meals than great scrapbooks. To each their own. Now I put everyone's pictures in labeled boxes (or at least I aspire to) and maybe when they're off to college I'll start scrap booking. Doubtful, but possible!

Katie continues to do great. She is an avid dancer and possibly a future candidate for political office. (Whatever ones you don't have to be a citizen from birth for...unfortunately, President is out for now.) She very much enjoys directing our actions about the house! Brad and I are working on this, but some days, it is the youngest member of our family who is in charge.

We spent the last weekend picking strawberries at Eckert's Farm in Belleville. Katie had a ball. She ate as fast as we picked, so by the time Brad, Alex and I had 2 boxes full of strawberries, Katie was a strawberry-stained sight to behold with juice running everywhere. She was even in her strawberry pants, so she was quite the cutie. I forgot the digital camera, so I have pics on a disposable that I need to send in.

Katie turned 2 on the 14th, so we celebrated with a smaller (than last years giant blow-out) gathering the Saturday before which turned out really nice. Katie was in her element and had a fantastic day. She is certainly happiest when she is the center of attention. Who can blame her? She now has a few more pairs of shoes to add to her collection. In case I haven't mentioned it, Katie is a shoe gal. If you ever see her and wonder why I let her wear those shoes, just remember that it's all about what Katie wants! I subscribe to the "pick your battles" school of parenting, and the last time I checked, silver shoes with jean shorts isn't life threatening.

Here are a few pics of the party...

Alex, Mom, Katie & Dad

Kitty cat cupcakes were the dessert for the day.

Katie enjoying the cupcakes and ice cream. Thank goodness for a beautiful day weather-wise, so the kiddos could eat outside where the birds would clean up the crumbs!

Okay, not a great photo, but one of the few I've got of just Katie hanging out and not eating. (She continues to be a prolific eater and that is what she did throughout most of the party.) Here she is showing off her Dora pull-ups. While she loves to sit on the potty, we are not really trying for potty training yet. These pull-ups are in use because she likes to take off the traditional-style diapers. This at least slows her down!

Katie and friends dancing with our friend Lowell. It really is all about the kids these days, and that is more fun than I ever could have imagined.

On a slightly somber note, on the night before Katie's actual birthday, I have a tradition of lighting a candle to remember her birth mother. This year I used Katie's birthday candle, which I thought was a nice thing to do. When she is older, she can participate if she wants. I have to say that in the chaos of day-to-day living, adoption or birth mother thoughts don't really cross my mind that much. Katie is just my daughter and she just looks like herself. But at milestones like birthdays, I always wonder if somewhere out there her birth mother hopes that she has found a better life. While I am not sure how I feel personally about open adoptions where the birth parents are still active in their child's life, I do wish that Katie's birth mother could know that she is fine. I hope that she cares enough to wonder, but in such a different culture, it is difficult to know for certain. Alex and Katie were running and playing in light rain last week while Brad and I watched. I remarked how amazing it was that you could take a child from an orphanage in China, and in a very short time they are a full-blown American child, just like any other down the block. That goodness we live in a world where that is true!

Katie's party generally hits on Mother's Day weekend, so we get to celebrate with my parents. These days are all the more special in the last few years since mom's health problems started. We had a great visit and the kids love playing with "the grandma and grandpa that live far away in Bement." You may note that I'm not very modest about how my children should feel about me on Mother's Day. I bought them matching shirts that said, "I love mom." Nothing makes me happier than those two little faces and their big, wet kisses.





To catch up on the last few months, I've added a few extra photos here. This is Alex and Katie at the Easter egg hunt at Grandma & Grandpa's in Sparta. We did both families this weekend, and that was a lot. It is hard to not celebrate with everyone, but it is difficult with the kids.

Katie at the park around the corner from home. She loves slides! Katie continues to be "ahead" of her peers in terms of gross motor skills, thanks to teaching by big brother Alex. Others her age have their moms right with them at the park. Katie pushes them out of the way and goes exactly where she wants. She is small but mighty!

Katie loves to cook, just like Alex. And I enjoy sharing that part of my day with them, too. Here Katie is helping make quesadillas for lunch. She does tend to eat a good chunk of the ingredients!



This is our duck and her 10 babies as they marched out of our yard and toward the water. Mama duck set up shop behind some flowers under Brad's office window in the back yard back in early April. She had 12 eggs (big, like chicken eggs) in her nest and 10 of them made it. The babies were born on May 10. Luckily, we got to see them before they left! We've also had killdeer babies this year and now are waiting for a nest of robins to hatch. They are living near the air conditioner.

Katie on the hunt for eggs at Easter. This was only a month ago, but we had that cold snap and it was only in the 40's that day.

Playing with our friends. Nita is the oldest and is in kindergarten, then Alex and Everett will start school together. Katie and Art (both in front obviously) are just 3 months apart in age.

Well, that is all for now. Most of you know we are considering adopting again. We submitted our paperwork to China in March and it got logged in April 12. So we are officially in line. However, the wait that was 6 months for Katie and pretty predictable is now more like 3-4 years long and unpredictable. China used to process a month's worth of applications every month. In the last couple of months, they've only processed a couple of days. The number of families applying to China to adopt has grown tremendously since we asked for Katie, so the process is much slower. While there are other options for adoption, we've been really happy with the China program. Time will tell.

365 Days Ago We Met Our Daughter

On February 19, 2005, I met my daughter Kaitlyn. It's been a year now, and the time has really flown. I think there is some theory that as you get older, time passes more quickly. It has to be true. And even more so when you have children. They change so quickly, and that is what the many photos in this post (below) will show you.

Looking at these pictures brings back a flood of emotion. Having a daughter was very important to me because I have a very close relationship with my mom. After losing several babies, I needed another child almost desperately. And luckily, little Long Mei Xiu was hanging out in China needing a mommy. I still am boggled by the thought that I had to go all the way to China to find my daughter, but I don't think about it very much anymore because all those things fade away. Now I am mostly boggled by how the house will every look presentable or what is going to be on the table for dinner. Life is normal and average around here, except we are what is termed a "conspicuous family" because we aren't all the same race. We get a little extra attention out in public at times, but I've even learned a lot about coping with that in the last year.

Katie was about 15 lbs. when she came home a year ago. Now, at 20 months she is 21 lbs. and tracking at the 25th%-ile for height and 7th%-ile for weight. A stark contract to her big brother who is in the 90%-iles for both, but they do just fine together. Katie is adding new words to her vocabulary daily, with "me do it" at the top of the chart. As anyone knows who talks to me often, Katie is a strong-willed little girl. We love her for it. She truly loves her big brother, and Alex is remarkably patient with his baby sister who always wants what he has. One of the greatest joys of parenthood for me is watching them play together in those somewhat rare moments when they are both enjoying the same activity. Every day Katie learns something new. Katie got herself mostly dressed this morning by herself, which is another new accomplishment. She is very opinionated about clothing, shoes in particular. She has some size 10 hand-me-down boots that she clomps around in...her size 4 feet can barely keep them on! She's basically pretty opinionated about everything...

We continue to be thankful for the gift we received from China, and we are doing our best to celebrate that culture as a part of our family. We all started Chinese language classes a couple of weeks ago. Alex is helping me with my counting. We are also having some friends over this weekend to celebrate Chinese New Year, including some of our travel mates from China. It is so rewarding to see all 8 of those little girls thriving in their homes. A year ago, we were all just meeting them.

I could probably wax poetic about adoption for awhile, but you know how I feel about it. We are excited to be returning to China to adopt again. We just sent paperwork in to the US government a week ago, and if things go well we'll have another member of our household in about 2 years. The wait that was 6 months (stretched to 8) for Katie's referral is now close to 18 months and continuing to lengthen. It is unknown when we would receive another referral, but we estimate 2-1/2 years and hope for sooner. We know it will be the perfect time for our family, whenever it is.

Enjoy the photos!

My first photo with Katie.
My first glimpse of Katie while I was waiting for the handoff...she is in the arms of her nurse.

Katie at the Zoo.


Katie and Alex on Christmas morning. (This is Katie before the pigtails go in.)

Just for fun, this is Katie when she is mad. We actually see this face a fair amount.



Katie is ready for more food. She is a tremendous eater!

Ready to eat yet again...

Katie trimming her tree at Christmas time.

Katie and her VIB...very important blankie.

A family photo at Junge Christmas. (Brad's extended family)

Katie and mom playing in the snow.

Katie all bundled up and ready for snow time!

1 Year Ago Today

This photo is of Katie now. I tried to post a shot of Katie "then" (our referral picture), but Blogger is not cooperating. Her hair isn't down that much because it gets wild and I love her in pigtails, but she is the cutest thing I've seen either way! (A little mommy bias there.)

We became parents again. On December 8 at approximately 10:00 a.m. we got "the call" all adoptive parents wait for. It was our social worker, Carol, with our referral information. (I have to tell you that as I type this, I am starting to cry because the memory of that day is so special to me.) I knew our referrals were "in" and that we would be getting the call because other, larger agencies had gotten the word out that they were headed to the US. (Contacts in China at other agencies often know when the documents are sent.) Parents in Europe had gotten their calls already, too, since they received the packages earlier than the U.S.

So the phone rings. It was earlier than I thought. I pride myself on knowing what to expect in situations like this, and I had "heard" from previous Lifelink parents that the calls usually start about 10:30 am. So I wasn't ready yet. Somehow, Brad and I both got on the phone and Carol shared with us the basic information about Katie. Her Chinese name, age, orphanage location, size and basic personality information. We saw her photo the next day at Panera, along with our friends the Rainey's and Calhoun's who also became parents (again for the Calhoun's) that day. When we got off the phone with Carol, we immediately called our parents to share the good news. I was crying so hard my dad didn't know who it was. I had experienced so many emotions on our journey to become parents again, but that day was pure joy in the truest sense of the word. And when Carol showed us her photo the next day, I knew. I never really believed the people who said this, but I knew that was my daughter. Somehow, she was born in China to another woman, but she was my child. And that truth can be substantiated by Brad. Why, practically every day he says,"Katie, you are your mother's daughter." I won't go into details about the context of those conversations, but suffice it to say both Katie and I know what we want and strive to get it.

So here we are, a year later. Contemplating adding another child to our house because the two we've got are just so darn terrific to parent. This will be a special Christmas for us. Last year we sent a box to Suichuan Social Welfare Institute with a stuffed panda bear, a photo album of our family and all hope for the future that we had. It went to a little girl who never had a mother, but now did...just thousands of miles away. That was our Christmas present to Katie. That was all we could do. Now she is like a gift to us ever day.

A friend shared this story with me earlier today, and I think it is touching.
A young man was walking along the shore and came upon an old man throwing beached starfish back into the sea, one by one. He said "Why do you bother doing that? You can't save them all." The old man threw another in and said "But I just made a difference to that one."

While I always say that as much as people say we've "saved" Katie, she really saved us. We needed her more. Now, we're okay as a family of four. But we have a lot and there are a lot of children out there with nothing. We just might try to make a difference one more time.

Happy Halloween!

Cute as a bug! A ladybug in fact. Katie celebrated her first Halloween tonight dressed up as a ladybug. She enjoyed visiting half the neighborhood trick or treating in the wagon. Alex and friends Eve and Sydney ran to the doors while Katie sat back and let the candy come to her.

The only thing cuter than a bug and is two bugs! Katie's costume was a ladybug (the symbol of little girls adopted from China...this was planned for awhile and isn't too unique in the Chinese adoption community). Big brother Alex was a scary green bug.

Katie meets goat. Katie has taken an interest in animals similar to Alex's love of things with four or more feet. This picture was taken last month during a visit to the St. Louis Zoo children's zoo. We are still zoo members and visit every few weeks.

Katie, nanny Denise and Alex playing dress up.

Team Alex at the 1st Annual St. Louis Walk for Food Allergy. Alex raised $1,000 for food allergy research. (He has life-threatening allergies to peanuts, tree nuts and shellfish.) Katie and family and friends all turned out to support Alex's efforts. (Alex is front and center with the red "arms" and Katie is in the last stroller on the right in the second row.)

We had our first family of four vacation to Wisconsin in September. We were so happy to be able to spend an evening with the Kinnamon family who traveled to China with us. In this picture is Carly Kinnamon and Katie. These two girls spent their first 9 months in Suichuan together. Their cribs were next to each other there. It is amazing how far these two little girls have come since I first met them both on February 19!

Alex, Dad and Katie at Wollersheim Winery in Wisconsin.

Brad & Alex, Katie & Lori, Christy & Carley, Scott & Caity Kinnamon. While you can't see Caity very well here, she is also adopted from China. For those that remember the trip, Scott & Christy were our experienced family in the group. They'd done the China adoption thing before. We had a wonderful visit with them in September and hope for many more to come. These girls have a unique bond.

We had some photos taken recently, and this is one of our favorites of Katie. Okay, it was the only one of Katie, but it is still a favorite. It reminds me of her referral picture. I used to look at her perfect little heart-shaped mouth and dream of having her in my arms. I think this is the first time I've seen that mouth perfectly still since the day she came into my arms! Let's just say that Katie is at that age where getting her picture taken isn't her most favorite thing.

Our family. I'm learning quickly what a challenge it is to get two young children to both look at the camera and smile at the same time. Any time it actually happens, it is a fluke! Note Katie's thumb sucking here...a sign of her comfort in front of the camera that day!

Katie is now 17 months old, running and climbing everywhere. Brad and I can't really remember Alex at this stage, but I'm guessing I might have blocked out the memory. :-) You literally can't turn your back on her in a second, because she will push a kitchen chair across the room and be on the counter, in the sink, etc. This is my child who will climb out of her crib any day now, even though she is not even 30 inches tall yet!

She continues to just do great. Amazingly enough, her doctor proclaimed her ahead of the pack in terms of motor skills. Just six months ago, she was so far behind. I believe Alex has a lot of influence on that. Katie's major life goal is to do exactly what Alex is doing at the moment. So she pushes her limits a bit. It's good for her.

She is learning how to feed herself with a spoon and continues to be a enthusiastic eater. She's now mastered the art of eating out of a plastic zip-lock bag, which is the key to our snack behavior in our family. Now we'll be driving along with both kids munching on a bag of apples, or pretzels...her favorite!

Katie is over 20 lbs. now, and has been for over a month. That was a major milestone because it let her turn to face forward in the car seat. She can now watch DVD's with Alex instead of just listen to them. Katie really still doesn't have much interest in TV and we certainly don't push it. I think Alex was pretty into Sesame Street by now, but Katie is more of a music kid. She loves to twirl and dance around.

Much to my enjoyment, her hair is almost long enough to completely fit into 2 pig tails! I put her hair up every morning during breakfast, and it is great fun for me. I always hoped to have a daughter as well as a son, and I do enjoy the 'girly' aspects of life with Katie. We're working on shopping, too. She has a definite opinion about shoes, so she shows promise.

Well, it is officially not Halloween any more if that gives you any idea what time of night I'm doing this. Blogger was giving me problems for awhile, so I hadn't gotten on to update this site. I had meant to do this earlier tonight, but of course life happened in between. So at 12:30 am I sit here typing, thinking about how many nights I did the same in China in a dark hotel room while mom and Katie snoozed near me. I would stare at Katie in her crib back then and not know exactly what the future would hold. I have now known Katie for 8 months and 11 days. I love her as much as any one could love a child, that aching love that knows no end that is tinged with fear of harm happening to your child. I look at Katie and see Katie, not Chinese Katie, not American Katie, just Katie. My daughter. Love is a tremendous thing. Occasionally, I wonder what would have been had we not gone to China. But this was God's plan for us. Katie and I. And Brad and Alex and everyone in our lives. I still don't quite understand exactly why everything happened as it did, but I now realize that not everyone can take in a child that does not share their biology. It puzzles me to know this, because it is unimaginable to me. How could anyone not love a child that is placed in their arms forever? I have had the unique experience of having one child that grew under my heart and one that grew in it.

There is no difference.

Six Months Home...and Into Everything!

Katie has now been home almost 6 months now (officially on Sept. 3) and it is amazing how much she's changed. I tried to add an older photo here to show you, but Blogger has been giving me difficulty this week in loading photos. I've been trying off and on for a week now, so I've given up for now.

Katie started taking steps right before the 4th of July, and by mid-July she had mastered walking to where it became her primary mode of transportation. I didn't think it would be a huge difference since she crawled near the speed of light, but I was wrong. We've installed cabinet locks in the kitchen to limit how much stuff she can pull out, completely rearranged the pantry to make the lower shelf Katie-safe, and moved a few things to higher ground. She is not super tall, but she has an amazing reach.

We're also proud owners of a new minivan thanks to Katie joining our family. We loved our Jeep Grand Cherokee, but the addition of child #2 made it somewhat impractical. I take the kids on lots of adventures in and around St. Louis, and I didn't feel safe loading a double stroller on two sides of the car. Katie is still backwards in her car seat, so Alex couldn't sneak by on her side. (And she'll stay backwards a bit longer, as she's lost a few ounces since her birthday thanks to walking.) The van also has almost every feature that a mom could want. They know their target market well!

Katie is also starting to talk quite a bit. She can say mommy, daddy, Alex, ball, blankie (one of her first, see photo below), up and something like "Callie" our cat. She has a strong personality and knows exactly what she wants and demands it. We think that these are strengths for any second child to have, though sometimes we wish they were a little less loud in their presentation. :-)

We continue to thank God that we have been so blessed by the addition of Katie to our family. Once in awhile, Brad and I consider what Katz life might have been like had she not left her orphanage. While it may be difficult to explain everything to her one day, we are confident that she is where she was meant to be. We could not love Katie any more if she was our biological child. We don't see a little girl from China when we look at her, we just see our daughter.

Katie and Grandma tillage watching big brother Alex play t-ball.

(Yes, I know it is a repeat. Too many problems with blocker to dare remove it!)

Katie sporting her newest look in pistils (bare tummy optional) with Daddy.

Katie and her Blanche. She's LOVES her blankie and will let you smell it if you want. Be warned, it smells funky. Can't get it away for frequent washings, which is what it needs!

Still Almost Walking...

Katie continues to be 'close' to taking her first steps on her own, but has yet to let go. We know pretty soon we won't be able to stop her, so we're letting her figure this out on her own time. She continues to prefer being vertical instead of horizontal, so she's pretty much only crawling to get from one place to another, then she's standing up. She can stand unaided for a fair amount of time if she doesn't think about what she's doing! Above she's riding one of her toys. She can push herself around the house on this, though she does backward a little better than forward.
Alex, Katie and cousin Hayley (4 months older) at Grandma & Grandpa's house for Father's Day. It is nearly impossible to get a picture of just our 2 kids together where everyone is smiling and looking at the right place, and getting a good one of 3 is darn near impossible! In this picture, Katie is in her little ladybug dress. Gymboree had a ladybug line out in the winter, and I bought it sometime between her referral in December and our trip in February. It was going to be her birthday dress, but since it was barely 50F on her birthday (unseasonably cold), she ended up in a dress that wasn't sleeveless. It was fun to have her wear this outfit since I'd had it for her for awhile now. It had cute little shoes, but since she wears a tiny size 2 in shoes, they were more like 'crib shoes' and not safe to let her walk around in. They were used for pictures only, though didn't make it for this one.

Katie enjoying some time with Aunt Patricia. She is at the age where she prefers mom and dad until she has time to 'warm up' to other friends and family members.

This is the view of Katie that we see most often at home. She is always standing up, and if one of us is standing up somewhere, she darts over to us and pulls up on our legs. Who could resist that face? Of course Katie gets whatever she wants at home!

Aunt Margie and Uncle Henry came for a visit. They are a special family in our lives because they have created their family in a way similar to ours. Their oldest son is biological and their two younger girls are adopted from Korea. Knowing their family always made international adoption seem like a very 'normal' thing to do for us and made the decision to adopt a fairly simple one for Brad and I.

Alex and Katie outside the children's garden at the Missouri Botanical Garden (which, by the way, is awesome). This is how we travel most days when a lot of walking is involved. Alex could technically walk almost anywhere on his own, but of course likes to ride if Katie is riding, too! The good thing is I can pack enough stuff under this stroller to have most of the house with us. We almost always pack a lunch for everyone to avoid allergic reactions (Alex has a life-threatening peanut allergy), so that's pretty handy.

Things continue to go well for our little family. Katie is thriving and is starting to use some language. She has 10 teeth, including 2 molars which were a little more challenging to 'welcome' into her mouth. Thank goodness for Tylenol! Alex and Katie have been enjoying lots of fun in the baby pool and on the slip 'n slide in the backyard. Katie actually just does a crawl rather than any sliding, but she enjoys it! We continue to be amazed at how easily our new family has evolved and we're talking about going back to China. We'd be back in a heartbeat if it was free, but we are hoping to figure out a way to add another sibling to the group.

Katie's First Birthday

Katie turned 1 on Mother's Day, May 14 and we celebrated with a party on Saturday, May 13. Lots of family and friends gathered to mark this milestone in Katie's life. To see her on her birthday, it is hard to imagine that just 3 months ago, she was living in the orphanage in Suichuan, China. She's an all-American girl now, crawling like a bullet and into everything. She enjoyed her party, even with the mass of people! She wasn't in mom or dad's arms much all day and she was fine with that. She actively participated in present opening (along with Alex and toddler friends) and particularly enjoyed her first real taste of dessert. Until now, she thought fruit was as good as is gets.

I've been slow to post these pictures because every time I tried, blogger was having problems. But, the wait has given Katie time to complete her 1 year check up at the pediatrician. She is now 18-1/4 lbs. (up 3 lbs. since coming home) and has grown an inch since stepping food on American soil, now standing (literally, since she like being upright) at 28 inches high. She was pronounced to be doing great and perfectly healthy. We have been truly blessed. Enjoy the pictures!
Katie meet sugar. Sugar meet Katie. Though it is a little hard to tell from her expression here, Katie really enjoyed her own mini birthday cake!

Katie, Alex and cousin Woody. Woody and Alex both showed Katie how to eat the icing!
Katie opening presents. Around mom and Katie are Alex, cousin Muriel, and friends Sydney and Eve who all helped out with gift-opening. Chaotic but fun!
More present opening. Katie stayed in the thick of things the entire time.

Grandma Bowen found special 1st birthday decorations made for high chairs, so Katie was all decked out. Unfortunately, she tried to eat them, too!

Alex and cousin Muriel (one of his best friends) waiting patiently for cake!

We have found it impossible to get everyone looking at the camera at once, so this is about as good as it got for a family photo. Happy Birthday Katie!